Endearest

animalstalkinginallcaps:

LOOK, LISA, FIRST OF ALL I JUST WANT TO THANK YOU FOR BEING AN ADULT ABOUT THIS WHOLE SITUATION AND AGREEING TO SIT DOWN AND TALK IT OUT. WE’VE BEEN GREAT ROOMMATES FOR A WHILE NOW AND I’D HATE FOR US TO LOSE THAT OVER SOMETHING SILLY LIKE MY VERY TINY, VERY LOW-KEY METH LAB.
DO YOU REMEMBER LAST YEAR WHEN YOU DID THAT THREE WEEK CLEANSE WHERE YOU ONLY DRANK LEMON JUICE AND MAPLE SYRUP WITH CAYENNE PEPPER IN IT? I SUPPORTED YOU, DIDN’T I? EVEN THOUGH I DIDN’T APPROVE. THAT’S ALL I’M ASKING IN RETURN.
AND, WHILE WE’RE ON THE SUBJECT, IF YOU’RE STILL LOOKING FOR A GOOD WEIGHT LOSS PLAN I’D LIKE TO RECOMMEND METH. IT’S BOUND TO TASTE BETTER THAN THE LEMON JUICE THING AND I’LL GIVE YOU A HUGE DISCOUNT.

You do the meth.

animalstalkinginallcaps:

LOOK, LISA, FIRST OF ALL I JUST WANT TO THANK YOU FOR BEING AN ADULT ABOUT THIS WHOLE SITUATION AND AGREEING TO SIT DOWN AND TALK IT OUT. WE’VE BEEN GREAT ROOMMATES FOR A WHILE NOW AND I’D HATE FOR US TO LOSE THAT OVER SOMETHING SILLY LIKE MY VERY TINY, VERY LOW-KEY METH LAB.

DO YOU REMEMBER LAST YEAR WHEN YOU DID THAT THREE WEEK CLEANSE WHERE YOU ONLY DRANK LEMON JUICE AND MAPLE SYRUP WITH CAYENNE PEPPER IN IT? I SUPPORTED YOU, DIDN’T I? EVEN THOUGH I DIDN’T APPROVE. THAT’S ALL I’M ASKING IN RETURN.

AND, WHILE WE’RE ON THE SUBJECT, IF YOU’RE STILL LOOKING FOR A GOOD WEIGHT LOSS PLAN I’D LIKE TO RECOMMEND METH. IT’S BOUND TO TASTE BETTER THAN THE LEMON JUICE THING AND I’LL GIVE YOU A HUGE DISCOUNT.

You do the meth.